Operation Omae o Korosu
by Sutoomu
Summary: Duo thinks up the perfect joke on his friends and recruits Heero to help him bring it to life. But the joke goes horribly wrong, revealing the awful reality that lies behind Heero's omae o korosu's. [oneshot] [complete]


This is the fourth fanfic I've posted. This is just a one-shot, an idea I thought up while I was trying to get to sleep. That's when most of my good ideas are created. Anyways, I ran it by my beta, and she thought it was a good idea, so I wrote it today and I'm posting it now. I hope I don't confuse anybody with this. I'm worried about that...

Disclaimer: I, Sutoomu(Storm), do NOT own Gundam Wing in any way. None at all. This fanfiction was made purely for fun and does not get me money in any way. Besides, it's not as though I have any money to be sued for...

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**Operation 'Omae o Korosu'**

**Storm**

Summary: Duo thinks up the perfect joke on his friends and recruits Heero to help him bring it to life. But the joke goes horribly wrong, revealing the awful reality that lies behind Heero's omae o korosu's.

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"Hmm, hmm hm hmm mmmmmm." 

"Duo!"

Duo looked up from the paper he had been doodling on and looked at Heero. He was sitting at his labtop, his fingers poised above the keys. He had obviously stopped mid-type to say his name. Of course, this time 'Duo!' had an alternate meaning underneath it. It was a warning, an 'If you don't stop humming right now, I will take out my gun and point it at you and omae o korosu!' warning. It was so nice of Heero to give Duo warnings like that. Though most of the time he ignored them and kept going.

But right now, he was comfortable, and he didn't want to move in order to run away and escape from stray bullets meant to scare him. So he stopped humming out loud, though his head still hummed as the pencil added another flame to Wufei's name. He already had Heero down in stiff, block letters. Trowa was done in plain letters with one eye O as the -o-. Quatre's was elegantly handwritten with light shining around it, and Wufei's was surrounded by flames. He would have done his own name as well, but he feared he might get a little too deep with describing his character in the name's design. And if any of his friends were to find it, there would be questions asked. Duo had a picture he had drawn in the past with his name and him on it, and it was hidden away safely. It was almost like a collage of his life, and he didn't want anyone to have a hint or preview of his true personality beside their names. So Duo decided to skip his name and go right to drawing little Chibis of them all. He drew a Chibi Trowa with a lion and a Chibi Quatre with a teddy bear and a cup of tea. He drew Chibi Wufei in a martial arts position, a sword in his hand, and then drew a Chibi Heero with a gun pointed at a grinning Chibi Duo, himself.

Duo tilted his head as he looked at Chibi Heero and the gun. An idea began to form in his mind and he drew a bullet shooting out of Heero's gun. Duo quickly pulled out another fresh page and began to rapidly draw, biting his tongue in concentration as he drew. After a few moment, Heero looked over at the braided wonder, who hadn't made a sound or moved in the past five minutes, other than the sounds of pencil on paper. Normally, silence from Duo meant trouble, and Heero would rather know about whatever trouble Duo was going to cause before he caused it. He watched as Duo gently blew some eraser markings off of a page, then took a stack of about ten and began to flip through them. A grin came onto Duo's face as he watched the little homemade slide show he had created. A slideshow of the craziest joke he had ever thought of. He looked up to drag Heero away from his labtop to help him and saw the stoic pilot staring curiously at him. Good, Heero was interested.

"Hey, Hee-chan," he raised an eyebrow suggestively. "Wanna help me out with something?"

"Depends."

"You and your bluntness," Duo laughed and jumped up off the bed to sit beside Heero. "Okay, so I've got this plan...call it a mission, and I need your help."

"What kind of...mission are we talking about Duo?"

"An incredibly insane, crazy one, that only you, Heero Yuy, Mr. 'Omae o korosu' can pull off," Duo announced. "It's perfect, Heero, it really is, but I need you!" Duo planted a finger in Heero's chest and gave th ebest puppy eyes he could bring up. "Pleeeeeaaaase?"

Heero, against his better judgement and his sanity, decided that agreeing to whatever Duo thought up was better than being tortured by puppy eyes all the next week. Besides, Duo seemed to enjoy playing jokes on his friends a great deal. It made him smile and laugh. Heero wanted to try smiling and maybe even laughing someday as well. And it wasn't as though anyone could try and get revenge on him like Wufei did with Duo. So he opened his mouth and said. "Yes." Immediately a completely insane, evil grin came to Duo's lips and he began to explain how the joke would go...

O> O> O>

"Okay, so remember we have to yell loud enough to get their attention," Duo whispered softly. He and Heero were standing at their door at the top of the stairs. "I made sure Wufei's not training, otherwise he'd never hear us. He's reading in the library room, and Trowa's sleeping in the livingroom while Q's waitin' for his cookies to be done. Man, that guy sleeps way too much..."

Heero didn't exactly feel comfortable with what they were about to do, especially the 'angry at Duo' part. He felt very, very nervous about the climax of their joke, since it was something he knew he would never do. In order to not let Duo down, since the braided baka was excited to death--bad wording there--about this joke, he approached it as he did a real mission. He understood exactly what he had to do, and he had to do it, even if he didn't like it. It was a mission...done to please Duo.

"Okay, first, let's wake Trowa up," Duo grinned, holding the door wide open. "Commencing Operation 'Omae o Korosu'." Heero absently wished Duo had picked a different code name as Duo flung the door shut as hard as he could. The slam reverberated throughout the house.

"It was just an accident. And why the hell can't I hum?" Duo yelled angrily, winking at Heero with a grin. "It's not your room only!"

Heero's cue. He opened the door again and closed it as hard as he would when he was angry, which wasn't quite slamming like Duo did. "Baka!"

"Duo?" Quatre's voice came lilting up the stairs from the livingroom. "Is everything okay?"

"Damnit, Heero!" Duo yelled, ignoring Quatre. "Stop calling me that! I am not an idiot!" Duo grinned and gave Heero a quick peck on the lips and a thumbs up 'good luck' sign before he began storming down the stairs. Heero watched and began to follow him down after about ten steps were between them. Duo suddenly stumbled ahead of him and fell head over heels down the remaining half of the stairs, landing in a surprised heap. Heero paused his descent. This wasn't part of the plan. Duo gestured for him to continue, knowing he would hesitate.

"Damn!" Duo yelled. "Now look what you've done?"

Heero was truly hurt at the anger he saw in Duo's eyes. He had to remind himself Duo was acting, and was just good at it. "Nani? I never even touched you," Heero protested in his cold voice, acting for the sake of the mission. Duo had no clue how much this hurt, how wrong it felt. "Why are you angry at me? If anyone, I have the right to be angry, not you." Heero's voice wasn't yelling like Duo's was. No. As Duo had pointed out, Heero displayed most of his anger with death glares and underlying meanings to one syllable words. So Heero put on one of his best glares.

"It was just one little frickin' scratch! You can get it fixed anywhere!" Duo shouted back, standing up in a huff. "I'm sick and tired of that labtop being your life!" Duo blinked as he realized that some of these things he were saying...part of these false feelings of anger were true. He did get very annoyed when Heero spent hours on end on the labtop.

"Duo, what happened?" Quatre had entered the hallway from the livingroom. A one very sleepy eyed Trowa appeared behind him.

"So I accidentally made one little scratch on his labtop screen," Duo ranted at Quatre, who winced involuntarily. Duo heartstrings pulled at this little gesture, but he continued. "It's no reason for him to go ballistic on me! It's not like he doesn't have money to fix it. Hell, he could buy three more labtops!"

"That's not the point!" Heero shouted. "You shouldn't have been fooling around. You're always fooling around. You're a crazy, psychotic baka who can't shut up for a minute! I'm sick and tired of it!" Heero felt something snap inside of him as he realized he was truly getting angry now. He had to remember that Duo's taunts were fake at all costs. Duo wasn't really angry. He couldn't let himself get caught up in his emotions...just complete the mission.

"Yeah, well at least that's better than being a psychoneurotic, passionless rock!" Duo yelled back, crossing his arms.

"So the crazy idiot is fighting back." Heero and Duo looked at Wufei, who stood nonchalantly in the doorway to the library. Pure luck that they had all been in places connected to ths hallway they now stood in.

"Shove it, Wufei," Duo snapped, and Wufei's eyes widened. Duo must truly be angry if he called Wufei by his proper name.

Heero glared at Duo for a moment. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. "Omae o korosu, Duo," Heero brought out the gun, aiming it at Duo. His glare was real, his anger was real. He was being lost to his emotions. He hated this! He didn't want to be a part of it anymore. But the small glimmer of laughter shining in Duo's eyes as they approached the climax of their joke was the only reason he continued.

"Sure, Heero!" Duo snarled. "You're always saying that. Why don't you prove it." Trowa's eyes were alert now, and Quatre was watching with his eyes wide, horrified that his friends were arguing this badly. Wufei was stupefied.

Heero did not like this anymore! This wasn't a joke, it was a torture show. This wasn't funny, this was horrible. Too much of this felt real. It wasn't right. And now, as Heero looked at Duo, with the gun pointed straight at his lover's heart, he felt dirty. Dirtier than he had ever felt before. He felt like a monster. He just wanted to throw the gun away and take Duo in his arms and hug the boy. He didn't want to shoot Duo, even if it was all in fun. He hated Duo for bringing up this stupid joke!

Duo stood at one end of the hall, Heero at the other with a gun pointed to his chest. Random thoughts ran in Duo's head as Heero did the scheduled pause before firing. He knew this wasn't real, but Duo felt scared. He was intensely frightened. What if Heero accidentally switched guns? What if he had put in a real bullet instead of the blank? What if he actually died, and then he was gone, and he could never see Heero or his friends faces again? No, stop this thinking. There was a blank shot in the gun. He wasn't going to die, and Heero only had one gun right now. The joke was going perfectly. Then why did it feel like something was wrong?

"Stop this, please," Quatre pleaded.

Duo could see Heero was hesitating. He had to pull the trigger. Duo had to do something to make him angry. "See?" He laughed, a sharp, cutting laugh. "You're weak, Heero. You're just weak." He spat out the words, anger and darkness shining in his violet eyes. Duo mentally crowed success as anger flared in Heero's mind. Heero's finger pressed the trigger.

Time seemed to move in slow motion. Duo saw the blank bullet shooting towards him. Memories of the war flashed through his mind, memories of bullets flying past his head, of bullets entering his flesh, of the pain and the hospitals and the death. He was going to die! He couldn't dodge, couldn't save his life, couldn't avoid it. His death was whirling up towards him. He cried out as the bullet hit him, toppling him over at the close range. The God of Death was dead.

Heero blinked as Duo fell and didn't move. Screams flew into his mind. It was a blank shot. It wasn't real. In a second, Duo was going to sit up and laugh his head off. He was going to give Heero that crazy smile he loved and call him Hee-chan. But Duo didn't move. Heero knew this was wrong! He should have backed out when Duo told him about it. he should have stopped when it all started to become real. And now it was real. Everything had turned real, and now he had shot Duo.

Heero yelled in pure sorrow and fell to his knees. He should have stopped Duo, should have told him. He should have quit while he was ahead! "I told you this was crazy!" he shouted over at Duo's body. "We shouldn't have done this. It's wrong...all wrong!"

Heero's voice seemed to jolt his three friends back into reality. They had all been staring in dumb shock that Heero had actually fire at Duo. Quatre now cried out and ran over to Duo. Trowa had an expression of pure anger and sorrow and pain at how Heero had betrayed them. Wufei was alternately looking from Heero to Duo with wide, unblinking eyes. Trowa walked over to Heero, unsure whether to knock him out or comfort him. He didn't see how Heero could be so hurt at Duo's death, seeing how he had caused it. He didn't understand how he himself managed to keep his own sorrow and anger at bay.

Duo frowned inside. This wasn't right. He felt...heavy. Weren't you supposed to feel light when you died, since your soul departed or something? This wasn't proper death. This was wrong. He was Shinigami, he should know. His eyes shot open as an angry voice floated over to him. It was Heero! Was he supposed to be able to hear his lover's voice when he was dead. Maybe...another voice was heard. It was Quatre, calling his name. Okay, he could understand how he might hear Heero when he was dead, but Quatre? Wait, what did that mean? Was he actually dead? He had been shot...in the heart... But there hadn't really been any pain. Duo had assumed this was because he died quick and painless, but maybe he wasn't dead. But how could that be? He had been shot...Duo gasped and sat up. The blank shot! He remembered the blank shot!

Duo's eyes met Quatre's, who had stopped about a foot away from him when he jerked up, breathing hard. Duo ignored his look of confusion and joy and...too many emotions for him to count. He looked and saw Heero, crouched on the floor, sobbing. Trowa was walking towards him, anger in his steps. Wufei seemed to be glaring at Heero now as well. Duo scrambled to his feet, ignoring the ache on his chest where the blank had hit him. He would have a bruise there tommorrow. He scrambled to his feet and ran towards Heero.

"Heero!" Heero's head shot up. Duo fell to his knees beside him and wrapped his arms around the shattered pilot. Heero was stunned, then remembered. Blank shot. No injury other than a bruise. No death, no blood, no dead Duo. Duo was here, alive, holding him. Heero felt an extreme sense of alleviation that Duo was okay.

"I am never helping you with a joke again!" he exclaimed, burying his face in Duo's hair as he returned the tight embrace.

Duo laughed, a shaky relieved laugh. "If I ever come up with another joke like that, I want you to tie me up and lock me in a closet for an hour."

"My pleasure, baka," Heero smirked, regaining himself slowly now that Duo was here with him.

"I'm missing something, aren't I?" Trowa asked, staring sideways at Duo. "Did I actually wake up, or is this just a weird dream?" Maybe he was still sleeping in the livingroom.

Duo couldn't help but laugh at Trowa's expression. "This isn't a dream, regrettably."

"Definite regret," Heero repeated.

"What the hell is going on!" Wufei demanded to know, glaring at them both.

"That's what I'd like to know!" Quatre agreed with ferocity in his voice.

"Just a stupid, idiotic joke thought up by a psychotically crazy baka," Duo muttered.

"You are not a crazy, psychotic baka!" Heero said sharply.

"And you ain't a psychoneurotic, passionless rock," Duo replied, kissing Heero lightly.

"Psychoneurotic...," Wufei murmured. "That was a great insult." He shook his head to clear it as Duo scowled at him and returned to firm, angry wufei. "Explain!"

And Duo did. He explained how he had drawn the joke out in Chibi form on paper, how he had needled Heero into helping him, how he had organized the whole thing and how it had gone out of control. The joke was that Heero would actually shoot Duo after an "omae o korosu" with a blank shot just so Duo could see his friends reactions when he popped back up. But it had all gone wrong.

"You actually thought it would be funny to do that?" Quatre asked with skepticism. "You idiot!" Quatre's fist shot out and connected with Duo's jaw. Duo stumbled back, Heero holding him up and touched his jaw, flexing it to shake out the impact. Heero death glared at Quatre, who glared right back. "You scared me half to death. Do you know how much that hurt?" Quatre asked, hsi eyes pained as he held his chest to explain.

"I'm sorry, Quat," Duo agreed, attracting everyone's stares. "I didn't think. It was the stupidest idea I've ever had. From now on, I'm going to stick to dying hair pink and doing nighttime makeovers. And, like I said to Hee-chan, if I ever think up another idea like this and ask for help, tie me up and lock me in a closet. I never want to do this ever again!"

"Ditto," Heero muttered, using one of Duo's words, which made the braided wonder smile.

"You'll probably get out," Wufei frowned.

"Oh, right," Duo laughed. "Well, when the time comes, I'll let you guys think up all the details."

"Heheh, revenge," Quatre rubbed his hands together, then put them over his ears as the shrill, piercing wail of the fire alarm sounded. "Shit, my cookies!" Quatre scurried off to the kitchen. The others following him curiously. He pushed open the door to let a torrent of dark smoke come floating through. Quatre coughed and waved a hand to clear some smoke away. He stuck his nose in his shirt and dived into the black kitchen, lcoating the stove. He turned it off and opened the door, where twelve chunks of black cookies sat smoking on a sheet. Trowa and Heero had located the two kitchen windows and opened them all the way, and Duo was fanning the smoke out with a dish towel. Wufei joined him at the other window and they eventually got most of the smoke cleared out. The sound of fire engines sounded in the distance, coming closer.

"Damn," Quatre cursed, in a pretty bad mood. "Now they're gonna make a fuss and ask questions." The fire alarm was still shrieking, so he wasn't heard very well. Quatre noticed that no one replied and yelled. "Can someone please shut that damn thing off!"

Heero heard and raised his gun, aiming at the fire alarm. With a press of his finger, the fire alarm shattered into dozens of peices.

Quatre blinked at the ruined alarm. "Uh...thanks. Not quite what I meant, but..."

"It works," Trowa finished.

"Um, Heero?" Duo spoke, making everyone look at him. He was pale as a sheet, staring at the gun in Heero's hand. "Is that the same gun that had the blank shot in it?"

"Yes," Heero replied.

And Duo fainted.

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**_+Owari+_**

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I hope you enjoyed it! I thought it was okay. What did you think? Review with your opinions. I need constructive criticism, but don't flame me, please! The fire burns...> REVIEW!...please? 

Storm


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